The ending
Để nhớ về cô gái năm ấy Bài viết gửi bởi loveless trong mục Chuyện trò - Tâm sự loveless.spiderum.com This is the ending for...
This is the ending for my story above. I find it so hard to write in Vietnamese, so this will be written in English.
***
03/12/2017
I arrived at the restaurant where the wedding would be held. There she stood in the hall, smiling cheerfully while greeting the guests. Next to her was her soon-to-be husband and their parents. Among all of them, I knew nobody but her, only her.
She looked beautiful and happy. Her white dress was a perfect fit, making her even more charming. I bet almost every man would fall for her, as I did - but that was 6 years ago.
That day I came, my mind was a mess. I couldn't even know exactly what was going on my mind. But I did know I didn't feel happy for her at all.
The wedding ceremony was a typical one. As it was proceeding, I tried to recall all the memories we had together. But it already started to fade away.
And as I wrote these lines, even the memory of that day were becoming more and more blurry.
Until the very last minutes of the wedding ceremony, nothing really happened. I just stood there, holding a can of beer while watching some of my friends who came with me taking some photos together with the bride.
I thought I could finally put to rest all the memories and I wouldn't need to recall them ever again.
Just as her parents were leaving and passing by me, her mother called me:
"Are you [my name]?"
"Um, yes" - I answered hesitantly as I was caught by surprise.
"Oh I see. I heard a lot about you from my daughter!"
"..."
I was speechless and froze for a few seconds.
Up until then, I had thought that I wasn't really significant to her despite being so close to her. I had thought nobody related to her would know me. And she never said that she told her mother about me. To the people around her, I was pretty much invisible. I took it as a fact, since I knew if those people became aware of my existence, things might be difficult and complicated for her. Sometimes I wondered if I had left any impact on her. Well, I should be just an outsider, and I accepted it.
But then I realized I was wrong. I didn't know she would talk that much about me to her mother. I didn't know the importance of my own existence to her. I underestimated my own ability.
For a moment, I felt so proud and glad to be such an important person to her.
And then I thought, what if I had tried harder? What if I had really pushed forward? What if I had been more active? What if I had loved her more? What if I had made her realize how much I loved her? Had I succeeded, would I have been the groom standing next to her there?
For a mere moment, all of those thoughts flashed into my mind. And then they left as quickly as they came.
The very next moment I knew, I felt utterly bitter and disappointed. I knew I was such a coward. I was afraid of failing and losing her, as I did twice in the past. I knew I was such a trash human being with no life goal, no motivation whatsoever. My soul was long tainted. I knew I could never deserve such an angel as her.
And I knew too well the very first time I was acknowledged by her family would also be the last one. I was given a chance, for 6 whole years, and I failed.
I wished I could cry.
A few seconds passed, and I was still standing there with a smile on my face - the kind of fake smile people would always see me wearing. The last thing I did was to say goodbye to her parents.
As I was leaving the hall, her younger brother, whom I had met once before, came to me. He walked beside me and tapped my shoulder lightly as if he understood everything - well, perhaps he was told about me by his sister, too. I remained silent.
10 years, 20 years or so from now, people will probably forget most of it. Even if I want to hold on, it would eventually slip from my grasp. But this feeling of sadness would always remain.
Everything truly ended this time, finally.

English Zone
/english-zone
Bài viết nổi bật khác
- Hot nhất
- Mới nhất

.......
You think a lots. A complicated man will be tired and makes mess of his life. Your past was a memory, it should be a walk to remember. wish you smile 

- Báo cáo

Mèo Nhọ
Against the wind I'm going home again
Wishing me back to the time when we were more than friends
But still I see her in front of the church
The only place in town where I didn't search
She looked so happy in her wedding dress
But she cried while she was saying this
Boy I've missed your kisses all the time but this is
Twentyfive minutes too late
Though you travelled so far boy I'm sorry your are
Twentyfive minutes too late
Đọc bài của bạn thấy nhớ bài này ghê 

- Báo cáo

loveless

I feel the same :))
- Báo cáo