Have you ever wonder about yourself?
He grew up act as good as others kid. Went to school, clean the house every morning, cooked the lunch, gave a hand whenever parent call for,...
Life was good back then. Or that's all he can recall upon his memory.
After twelve years at schools, next target is university. He left home and moved to the city, all alone. He finished university in no time and started to go to work.
He went throught many environment, meet many people, did many things. Life couldn't be better or at least that was how he thought it is.
Of course, there are storms emerged at some point throught out all those time but does storms matter? Suddenly, he freezed in thoughts.
"What am I even doing?" He asked. He was borned not that he choosed to be borned. He lived the life like nobody's business. It sound ridiculous, he knew it but does it matter?
He took a break, breath in, breath out. "Nah, take it easy" he thought. Up until now, he always watch the world from his stand point but little does he know, he himself is a part of that f*cking world too.
But how can he watch himself? No one ever told him how to do so. Who can teach him those stuffs? Who else beside himself? And that's was how he came up with the idea to go around borrow point of view of others.
He started asking people around him. Ask them to describe him by the way they feel. Some people knew him for years, some people he just meet few time. The answers came back in all shape and size. Each of them pictured him in a unique way. At first, he didn't get it. There is only one of him but he received not one but many answers. But then he realized that was not how things work.
There are no wrong answer, they are all correct when placed in the context of the people who gave them. People took him on differently. So the way they feel about him make up the answer. It matter in some way or the others but there is a fact that those answers is all about him.
He collected all the answers and built up a figure. It look weird. But weird is not bad. Weird is weird. Now the question is "what's next?". He onced try to stick to that weird figure but it didn't go so well. He kept collecting answers and built up new figure. It still weird but it not match the previous one. What's going on?
Perhalf, he was an unstable person from the very beginning. He kept changing himself implicitly without his realization. Or perhalf, everybody do that without knowing it.
One of his friend once told him "You are who you are, why do you care about others opinion?". He just smile away. Cause he knew that he is the one who suppose to know who he is but he don't. That's why he care about others opinion about him that much.
But does it even matter? So tell him who he is or tell me who I am. Would you?